December 16, 2013

My Farewell to Blogger Idol

My first impulse upon being eliminated from Blogger Idol was instant acceptance. I had known it was coming. That's what happens when you dedicate the majority of your emotional and intellectual energy elsewhere so late in the game. And I have no regrets, I was doing something I believed was important, and I think I may have actually helped someone in doing that. So I'm proud of myself.

My second impulse was to use the link a friend sent me, about a million times. That actually made me laugh my butt off.

Third, I blamed my husband. After all, his advice guided the post that eliminated me, and he has minced no words over the last several months about how much he dislikes this competition. On top of that, my elimination means he gets beard grooming supplies, and he's always been very beard-proud.

That was when I found out I'd actually tied for the lowest score (or second highest, whichever), and I got angry. Or maybe hangry, who knows.

As soon as I realized I was going through my stages of grief backwards, I did what I always do to make myself feel better about life. I ate and pouted. Simultaneously.

First a bag of marshmallows. Yes, the whole bag.

Photo on 12-13-13 at 1.27 PM #3 2

Then I made a double batch of chocolate marzipan cookies.


Then I had a deep friend food fest at my favorite pizzeria. And a nice cup of hot tea.


And then I saw the Desolation of Smaug, ate a bunch of peanut m&ms, and drank a giant slurpee. But I was still bummed out.


So I curled up in my nice warm bed with my nice warm husband and ate more spinach and potato pizza and watched the Daily Show.


And then I realized what had been missing from my process... music.

And so I will bid adieu to Blogger Idol the same way I started... with a song.

So long, Blogger Idol. It's been awesome.


I want you to know, that I'm happy for you
I wish nothing but the best for you both
A better writer than me
Are you funnier than me
Would you climb up a tree with a hatchet
Do you write eloquently
And do you have three babies
Or do you write funny stories about your pets  

'cause the votes were for me but a tie wasn't able
To make it enough for me to be Blogger Idol, no
And every time I write a post
Nobody will judge it and tell me
How much it sucks, or it rocks
I'm not in the finals

And I'm here to remind you
Of eleven bloggers who went away
You'll battle for the grand prize
And the new Blogger Idol will be crowned
Go, go, go kick some ass

You judge very well, all the blog posts
I don't write as well, or I'd still be there
Did you forget about me Mr. Manderstanding
Daddy's in Charge wanted me to win the contest
A grin's been slapped on my face because I got to third place
and now we'll find out which blogger i  s the best

'cause you judges are nuts and you sit on your butts
telling us to write stories about being arrested, oh
And every week we'd laugh so hard
We freak out every Tuesday and beg for votes
'til we won, but I lost
I had a good time

And I'm here to remind you
Of the fun I had in Blogger Idol
Best of luck in the Finals
I'll  be judging there like Simon Cowell
You, you, you oughta know

There can be only one
Real Life Parenting
or Mid life at the oasis

'cause the jokes that we made made us laugh every day
And I'm not gonna lose
all of the memories with my new friends, and you know it
And every time I hear that song in some elimination
I'll still hate it...well we all hate it

and I'm here to say Thank You
To my lovely readers who vote for me
You're the best people ever
You got me so far and showed so much love
You, you, you oughta know

and I'm here to say Thank You
To my lovely readers who vote for me
You're the best people ever
You got me so far and showed so much love
You, you, you are the best


  1. Ha! Amazing as always! Love you Lea, you are fabulous!


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