April 16, 2014

Closing Time

Blowing kisses goodbye
It's here. The final Twisted MixTape, at least until the fall comes.
My Skewed View
I'm sad. Saying goodbye to a friend sucks. But it's a part of life.

This last mixtape's theme is "Farewell." I thought about putting together a collection of songs that say goodbye, but I'd like to do something else. I'd like to say goodbye to other friends I've had to part from.

So here are goodbye songs for many of my friends from whom I've parted, and a few little stories about our farewells. Because I can't just give you a list of songs. As always, I have to give you a miniature musical biography,

I hope you don't mind.

This first song is for Uncle Brony. Uncle Brony, the first good friend I made when my family moved to Michigan the year I started middle school. He and I made each other mixtapes constantly. That's not really true, he made me mixtapes for every occasion. And from him, I learned the skill. This song was on the tape he made me to listen to in the car when I got my first driver's license. And it's that tape I was listening to the first time I drove on my own, in the car, with my license. As I drove home, I saw him walking down the street. I rolled down the window and waved... hitting a parked car in the process. I'm not sure he noticed I was listening to his tape while he laughed at me. I never really said a proper goodbye when I moved to Chicago. But I love him and think of him often, particularly when I hear this song.

This is for my friend JP. She was in my wedding. We worked together, once upon a time. She was one of my best friends, and then one day... she wasn't. I called her about something, and she ranted at me for half an hour about all the things I'd ever done wrong during our friendship, most of which had never even happened. I was shellshocked. I apologized, and honored her request never to contact her again. I still feel confused and guilty about the whole thing. I still don't really know what happened. I would still love to hear from her again. And if I could sent her a song, it would have been one that managed to convey guilt, and frustration, and confusion, and affection. And this is the only song like that I know.

This is for Aunt and Uncle Texas, who moved. To Texas. And who I think of often, although I see them so rarely. Uncle Texas and my husband were practically married in college. When Uncle Tex got married, M was in the wedding. And he was best man at our wedding. Aunt Tex was a master at making jokes at M's cancer when he was sick, and made herself MVP for my wedding party. They're two of our favorite people in the world, and no matter when or how, we always know we'll see them again. Though I have no doubt Uncle Tex would prefer I picked a Hanson track for him. That's not a joke.

This song is for Sara, Ellen and Krista, the girls I spent all the sunny days of my middle school glory with. We swam in public fountains, danced down city streets, wore crazy clothes and crazier hair, and blissed out on youth and beauty and freedom. I really haven't seen those girls since, but I think of them often and wish them well in everything.

This is for my art school friends. Keeley, Erica, Nichole, Wade, Jesse... the people I spent so much time with in the dorms, painting and crafting and generally complaining about the limitations of our assignments, and who scattered to the winds (and me with them.) I loved those crazy artists. And I hope they're happy doing what they're doing. Lunatics.

For Aunt Blackbird (do you like the name?), who moved away just when we were starting to get so close. Distance never keeps friendship from happening. If there's anything the internet has taught us in the last decade, it's that we can have friendships that have nothing to do with proximity.

For Dynamic Tension, who I spent so long with. Who I bled with, and sewed with, and danced with, and laughed with, and slept in huge exhausted piles of people with. I leave you with this.

This one is for JS. My oldest friend, my best friend. I haven't seen her in almost six years, and that's about how often I do see her. I'm going to make a trip to visit this summer, and keep the streak going. Every six years seems like was too long. It is too long. But we've seen each other ever six years since we were eleven, with a random brief visit or two in between. I always feel a little alone when I think of her, so far away. But I always feel loved and happy at the same time. She's a kind of magical person that way.

For Aunt Vox, who I love and who marches to the beat of her own drum- always. I miss you constantly, and I wish I had a better chance to say goodbye before you left the midwest. And every time you leave it again.

To all my Community High School friends- Cat, Kent, Eric, Nick, Teo... I love you all, and even though I didn't graduate with you, the sappy "graduation song" thing still makes me think of everyone from high school so fondly. I love you all.

Last but not least, goodbye to the Twisted MixTape crew.
I'll miss you.


  1. I really like how you approached this topic. It was really sweet how you had a person and memory attached to every song.

  2. And as usual she does not disappoint. This was a great way to do this theme, closure, tying up loose ends, letting go.
    Perfect songs.
    One of my all time favorites is The Way, I think it was one of those songs that if you heard it during the right time in your life it stuck with you forever. I put it on my summertime mixtape because we roadtrip to South Carolina every year, and it's kind of about a road trip....
    Thank you so much, it was so awesome to get to know you at Blogher and have you be a part of MixTape for this long. It really is just a break, once a month come the fall. I'll be knocking on your door.

  3. What a wonderful and fitting tribute to your loved ones. I also have certain songs that I associate with people, memories, stretches of time. It would be fun to put that down on paper. (Or computer screen.) :)

  4. Really nice blog you have! Now there is both a Blog Hop and a giveaway on my blog if you would like to take part, you are welcome! http://gladalinjen.blogspot.se/2014/04/blog-hop-blowout.html

  5. pretty nice blog, following :)

  6. Oh, I love the songs you chose! Like you, I have associations with so many songs. I especially love the Semisonic song. I always have. I always loved the line "You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here." It's just so evocative and perfect for so many transitions in life. It gets me!



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